Rito and Li Update: A Mix Match from the start...

Theme Song: Colorblind- Counting Crows
You can't deny incompatibility between two people... you can try to hide it, to mask it, to ignore it.. but in the end those inconsistencies will shine through and rear their heads into the open... Having said that my, dear Rito and her husband have called it quits... like, for real, for real. She's been so preoccupied with her budding love with Vu-san that I think she didn't foresee the very real feelings of this break up creeping up on her.... Here is her note:

I just called him to see when we could talk/get together to discuss what items need to be fixed at home. he responded with just something short and he didn't really say much of anything else. he seems so distant and I guess that's too be expected, but I didn't expect it to hurt the way that it does.

I didn't realize that it really would hurt this much. I'm glad it does. And I think it will hurt even more if I take the time to be truly by myself so I can truly appreciate this loss. This way, I won't have anyone to use as a crutch and I can have an appreciation for the pain he may be feeling. I need to feel the full affects of what it means to separate from my partner of 8.5 years.

8.5 years is a long time.... I'm not sure how I would feel... Seeing these relationships falling apart around me just reinforces the time that I need to spend apart from Joel, to reflect, to strengthen my relationship with God and find that balance. Le dije hoy a mi amor que necesitaba tiempo... y el me dijo, perfecto, lo que necesites te lo doy. No me quiero aparte de el porque estoy insegura, solo que quiero encontrar el balance entre mi relacion con Dios, y me relacion con el. No quiero descuidar mi relacion con El por culpa del Che. Nuestro Dios es un Dios bueno pero tambien es celoso y no quiero que me lo vaya quitar porque yo permeti que el Che venga antes que Dios. Tambien tengo que deshacer every shadow of a doubt para poder apreciar todo el amor que el Che tiene para dar, y se que es mucho porque hasta este punto me ha mostrado mas que me podria imaginar. Quiero que en nuestras vidas juntos no desprecie ni una gota de el amor que el me entregue... quiero apreciar cada segundo, cada palabra, cada caricia, cada gesto and treasure it. Creo que si lo de nosotros es real entonces un tiempo aparte no deberia de hacernos daño. Este es el tiempo para disciernir nuestros sentimientos. Hoy Dios me hablo a traves de alguien y me dijo lo siguiente:

Procura tres cosas

1) Que en tu corazon alla paz primeramente

2) Que sientas que tu vida con Dios crece cada dia mas

3)Nunca dejes que tu corazon tome el control de todo sino que sea Dios quien lo haga

El tercero fue el que mas me impacto porque justo el viernes estaba pensando que el che tenia control sobre nuestra relacion y me puse a planear como era que yo iba tomar las riendas de nuevo... y despues me di cuenta que eso estaba mal. Es Dios el que debe controlar esto, no el Che, no yo... Dios. 100%, sin duda, sin excepciones. Y eso es lo que quiero para nosotros. Hoy y por siempre.

Gracias Dios por dirigirme y por darme el valor y la fuerza para obedecerte. Gracias porque me has mandando un hombre que tambien te comprenda y te respeta. Yo se que en este tiempo de refleccion tu me vas a revelar mucho y I can't wait to hear everything you have to say.

PS- My response to Rito:
I hate that you're hurting but in a way a small part of me is relieved that you are. That means that you're coming to realize that at a point in time this was the man that you truly loved and that's why you married him- not just because he was your partner for x amount of years. Don't try to hide your pain or deny it from yourself, I think that you need to feel that pain in order to heal and I'm glad that you're acknowledging it and not just letting your love for another person be a band-aid for this. The things that we experience in life define who we are and shape our characters and personalities so I think it's really important that you take time so that at the end you'll know who you are and what you want. I think everything will be much clearer once you begin to heal from this. Yes, it make take a while and you may not fully recover for a long time but I think soon you'll start to get a clearer picture as to who exactly Rito is and exactly what she wants from life; and that, my dear, will be the headway you need to, not just find, but figure out what it is that you're looking for in this life.


ps- Isaiah 58:8
"Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness will go before you,
and the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard"

Don't worry, God will shed some light on your situation and you'll live your life in peace, victory and love. But remember, that no one but God can give you these things though it may seem otherwise. The love and peace in your heart that God can provide is like no other... I know you'll find your way back to Him when you're ready. Remember, He'll always wait for you.

I love you!!

Alé